Activity #9

Activity #9
The issue of “Same Sex Marriages” is a very heated argument in our society today. The arguments for and against it both make very good points and have great facts to back up their position. This issue has been in all of the states of the United States court systems to try and legalize it or ban it from their state, along with many countries. The biggest of the arguments for and against this issue have to do with children and how this type of marriage affects them. Besides this, there are many other points that each side makes to ensure that their position is the better one.
For the side against same sex marriages, the readings for this activity gave some very good issues that help with this side of the debate. One of these arguments is defining the institution of marriage. When dealing with marriage, there are laws prohibiting marriage of a child and an adult, an adult and his/her parent, or to roommates with no sexual relationship. By allowing the few people who are the same sex to marry, it opens doors to many other sticky situations concerning the laws that I just mentioned. By allowing this one thing, many other issues could come up with marriages between other such “non man-women” marriages and could taint the long lived institution of marriage. Another argument against same sex marriages has to do with children. If you allow same sex marriages, it will start to become a problem with adoption. This will lead to more and more children growing up without a mother or father, due to the fact that, according to Peter Sprigg, most homosexual relationships do not last longer than 2 years. Therefore, when the couple splits, custody is an issue they have to now deal with. Also, of the relationships that do last, studies show that children raised by lesbians are less likely to fit in, more likely to become homosexuals themselves, and are more sexually adventurous. These arguments are some of the top arguments that are used by people against homosexual relationships that want to marry.
Though there are many arguments that are against same sex marriages, there was a huge study done by Lawrence A. Kurdek that made many important findings. He studied how homosexual couples and heterosexual couples stay together and why. He also studies both kinds of couples with children and without. In all of the broad topics that he studied his findings were clear. In lesbian and gay couples, there was no added stress in the relationship. There was also no difference of problem solving in their relationship then in a heterosexual relationship. The only study that had a difference in it from homo to heterosexuality was in that gay and lesbian couples got less support from their family. With this added conflict, some couples do not stay together as long.
My take on this issue is kind of split. I do believe that gay and lesbians should be able to live how they want. They should be able to express their love to whoever they want, and as we have studied in previous chapters, gender is just a perspective right? So I do believe any relationship is a valid one. But I do not believe that homosexuals should be able to marry. I understand some of the arguments given by Kurdek in his study but I also more strongly feel for the ones against such an act. I, imparticular, agree with the fact that not only is it hard for children who are adopted by gay or lesbian couples, but if such a relationship were to break up, it is so hard for children to overcome and cope with divorce. And since the “divorce” rate is higher in homosexuals, why make it legal for them to marry in the first place when most end in them splitting up?